Servo Quod Lost In In Man’s Terra
It’s a Dump Filled with abusive and in appropriate subjects and expressions if you are not cool with that go away, if you are then feel free to step right in :)

Flashes

Again with my sleeping habits I mean this blog has become about my sleeping habits more than what I actually do when I am awake Fuck.. “Now that being vented, here we go”
Flashes, yes ladies and gentlemen that what I officially see when I close my eyes and want to sleep red flashes that are cut into little pieces with a piercing noise like a psychotic person is holding a sharp knife and decided to cut through a think fabric that is my unconscious.
Now that we mentioned the fucker it has been giving me hell, yes my dreams had been as tiring as ever full of muffled agony and crying that I literally wake up with puffy eyes cause I have been crying in my sleep which is not a presentable way to show up at work and not a healthy way to start the day with a splitting headache cause you have been crying when you should have been sleeping. What is my sub-conscious trying to tell me? I have no idea, but I really hope he would give up and leave me be at least in bed, may be I am keeping him on a tight leash when I am up that he only runs free when I am sleep when I let go and put my guards down. Damn even my sub-conscious is playing against me.
I will leave you with this paranoid statement and the below song by Seether:

Leave your mark under my skin
Oh my how strong you are
And feast your eyes on my disdain
And hope this one won’t scar

I will never belong to you, again
I will never belong to you,
Push if you still need my pain
Cause I will never tell
And scream if you still hate my name
Cause I’ll be where I fell

Come sit close to me,
Let me feel your breath
Come sit close to me
Hands around my neck
Come sit close to me,
Let me feel your breath
Come sit close to me, close to me, yeah

I will never belong to you, again
I will never belong to you

If I decide that I am alive
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful
And if I confide that I am a liar
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful
Push it in ’til it breaks, if it bleeds then I’ll be okay

If I decide that I am alive
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful
And if I confide that I am a liar
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful
If I decide that I am alive
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful
if I confide that I am a liar
Than I’m diseased and ungrateful

Come sit close to me
Come sit close to me
Come sit close to me


Diseased – Seether
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20 Responses to “Flashes”

  1. Well I am glad that your dreams are only manifesting the psychological pain not the physical as well. I think you need a beak dear from all the stress you have. Just cleanse your soul and you would be okay.
    M.El

  2. If it became chronic(Hopefully no), I guess you should try hypnosis to see what’s behind those flashes!

  3. Oh now I understand where the puffy eyes comes from. Can I tell you something but do not get offended, you need therapy I have a good psychiatrist care to have his contacts?

  4. M.El:
    That would have been something I am glad you managed to see a silver lining in this mess. Thanks for letting me see it too.

    Ice:
    I think I should give it a try its on its way to being chronic not yet though.

    Paul:
    None taken. You should let me know the contacts just in case and now since you know the secret behind the puffy eyes Keep it to yourself and away from the big Gossiper sure you know who I mean 🙂

  5. Oh I presume you mean the famous receptionist “E” The Queen of gossip. she already asked about the reason.. merkizza ma3akie 2awee isnt she? I wonder why.. Do you think she swings that way ? “Scratched head in wondering”

  6. Yes that is the one, she asked about it already Good God this girl has a lot of free time on her hand. Fe3lan merakiza ma3yia.. I do not know about swinging that way but it would not surprise me though nothing does these days..

  7. Mmmm come think about it she always asks about you.. Way too concerned and curious than the usual I think you should be careful avoid being alone with her especially in the ladies room and I thought she would be hitting on me soon. I am lucky that way befriends the only lesbian in the company “Sighs”

  8. its trying to tell you to stop watching scary movies. I dunno, personally , dreams never scares me.. they are just dreams, some times when i tell my dreams to my friends they are like “how do you sleep at night !” , but me, am like “meh”

  9. Artist:
    It is not about being scary its about being tiring, draining you know what I mean

  10. Artist:
    I find it very brave of you to tell your friends your dreams when I was a kind my mama use to tell me do not talk about bad dreams or it will come true till this day I never tell my dreams good or bad. Come to think about it Boss you never tell the details of your dreams why is that?

  11. Actually Paul I do not talk about my dreams cause I think they are too personal not cause I am afraid that they might come true. If your theory is true you should talk about the good ones who knows may be you would get lucky 8) Let me know

  12. Or I could jinx them and they never come true You try it out Boss then I will follow your lead 😉

  13. Don’t over-rate dreams, not all are prophetic, most aren’t actually.

    Your subconscious mind needs to vent somehow, stop blocking it while you’re awake.

    That’s the best advice I have to give.

  14. Slop:
    If I unblocked it while I am awake will be dwelling on the bad mood which will be bad for both me and the people around me don’t you think?

  15. well.. on not sleeping
    well.. duh, i know lot of ppl who are zero hour sleepers.. i am one also who finishes work at 5 – 6 in the morning…think of it as a way to do more , to exceed in something you always wanted to do
    read more books, learn to paint,just do something u always wanted to be best at
    self study for a big certificate at work in ur domain
    never go to bed unless you have that good feeling about yourself that you gave a good fight, that the day was good, that you achieved something new

    eventually you will end up going to be dead tired and happy
    i dare you then to keep having dreams or anything of the like.

  16. i agree with umslop. dreams are just stuff in your subconscious mind, you might never remember in your life because they are deep down, so, its all coming from inside, and it shouldn’t be tiring just forget about them in the morning , i mean, try your best (:

  17. Life-Geeked:
    Thank you for your advice I am going to try it out but you have to know that I am the only one awake around the house so anything with minimal light and sounds is welcomed so studying and reading is out of the question.

    Artist:
    I agree with you and Slop all the way but it seems that I can not ask my sub consicous to stop getting things away I wish I can but in my sleep he is the one calling the shots. I have no freaking idea why I am referring to MY MIND AS he.. LOL

  18. good good, that is the first sign of being schizophrenic 😛 jk, it will go soon, just get some good sleep, enjoy some relaxation before you sleep, don’t watch tv or anything. take a warm bath, read a nice book, and sleep , for a week .. and then i guess there won’t be any more subconscious deals

  19. I like being schizophrenic its interesting plus you never feel lonely you always have company I hope it will be soon Today I slept for 9 hours only with the aid of sleeping pills do not want to get used to those though..

  20. Sloppy:
    It shows us how small the world is 🙂


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